Modern Non Traditional Wedding Vows
Whether of the religious, cultural, or non-secular type, traditional wedding vows are not for everyone. No matter how varied these existing vows are or how much liberty can be taken with them, sometimes it still doesnt fit perfectly with what some couples have in mind.
And thats okay! For modern couples that want to take their wedding vows completely into their own hands, there are also a few of options to try on for size.
Award-winning Newport wedding celebrant Emily Hall offers some examples:
- Secret vows Each partner writes their vows in secret to the other and they only hear them for the first time in the ceremony.
- Couple or joint vows The couple writes the vows together and reads these out together during the ceremony. These can become a couple mantra for them in their relationship.
- Letter vows The couple keeps their vows private, writing these in letters to be presented to each other during the ceremony. The letters are read later in a private moment, but the exchange makes for a lovely moment in itself.
- Veiled or ninja vows Each person gets to write the vows for the other to read out on the spot at the ceremony. These vows can be lots of fun and create light-hearted moments.
Secret vows are a favourite among modern couples. No matter what kind of couple you are and what experience you want to create for your wedding day, these secret vows give you all the freedom in the world to profess your love for each other.
Wedding Vow Quotes From Books And Songs
Whether you have a favorite song that makes you think of each other, love listening to music together, or are avid readers, quotes from romantic works can be a great addition to your personalized ceremony message. These wedding vow quotes and passages are pulled from songs and books, and they may even make you feel like you want to sing along.
Sample Wedding Vows For Him
When youre writing wedding vows for your husband, you want to make him feel like a million bucks. Whether hes a macho man or not, you need to make sure that your wedding vows are going to bring him tears of happiness and sentiment.
- Nothing brings me more happiness than to call you my husband.
- Youve provided me with a life of joy and laughter.
- I promise to love you, care for you, honor you, and cherish our marriage. I will never forget the day that I met my best friend in person! The first time I saw your face it was like looking at the sun coming up over the horizon on a new day. It warmed my heart just knowing that now theres someone who loves me as much as I love them. You make every bad thing seem better by being near me because nothing is more important than spending eternity with you.
Hopefully, this provides inspiration for finding unique words when writing ones own vows! After reading these examples it should be clear that a simple youre the best or well never part may not work as an effective marriage vow. Instead, think about what your loved one cares about and how you can best express your love.
Wedding vows are one of the most personal moments in a couples life, and they can be as simple or complex as you wish. There is no right way to write your own wedding vows.
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Consult Each Other But Have Different Vows
Come together initially and have a briefing about length, tone, and layout. You can outline anecdotes or little titbits of what you want to include, just to run it by your significant other. After all, its them who knows you best. On the day, the vows will be familiar, but the finer details will be a surprise.
Set A Word Count For Your Vows
Personally, I think if one person is a born poet and the other just gets to the point, theres no need to force a partner to say more or less than they want to. As long as its from the heart, the length doesnt really matter.
You may want to set a maximum amount of words though. Usually a 300 word limit or about two minutes long is a good guide for this part of your ceremony.
Going through the process of writing your own vows can call out a huge number of things you wish to tell your other half. If you feel like its getting too long for the ceremony, or there are some things youre not comfortable sharing publicly, consider writing it in a letter to give to your partner the morning of the wedding.
Tips For Writing Awesome Vows:
Now that Ive convinced you that original vows are the way to go, here are a few tips to help you get started writing them and make sure theyre ready for the big day:
- Get started sooner rather than later so you have time to really dedicate to writing your vows.
- Make a list of shared favorites to draw quotes and ideas from, both funny and romantic!
- Think of it as a love letter with promises. Tell your spouse why you love them and why youre choosing to marry them, then make your actual vows.
- Keep it simple and honest. It doesnt need to be a grandiose speech just be yourself!
- Practice reading it out loud. Even though youre not saying it in front of a big crowd, you should still make sure you like the sound and feel of it.
- Write it out on your computer or scratch paper until its exactly how you want it
- Once you have the words perfected, write your vows down in a keepsake book like this one to bring with you on your wedding day and cherish for years to come! If you want to wait to write them out until the day of, I love capturing photos and videos of my couples preparing their vows.
Whether you write your own or use traditional vows, make sure you discuss and decide what to do with your partner. Its the most fun if you both write your own vows so you each get to give and receive a special moment during your elopement ceremony.
Practice Saying Your Vows In Front Of The Mirror
Try to memorize your marriage vows so that they seem more natural and heartfelt when you are saying them to your partner. Look into your partners eyes when you are saying your vows to make them aware of your sincerity and honesty.
Reading your vows from the paper will not have the same effect. Start practicing days before the ceremony so that you are comfortable saying them in front of an audience. Even if you have an attack of nerves, you will be confident when saying familiar words.
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How To Write Your Wedding Vows
Updates for this wild world we’re living in
Its funny how not too long ago, wedding vows felt like the thing that landed at the bottom of your wedding to-do list. While writing marriage vows languished at the bottom, the top of the list was all that logistical : figure out your seating chart, nail down your perfect dance party playlist, create an amazing filter. And then the pandemic happened, and in an instant, weddings went from all the things, to just the things that really mattered.
As we are slowly emerging from a year+ of Zoom weddings, and starting to see hints of weddings returning to normal I hope we all take with us a focus on the parts of a wedding that make it magic. The two of you. Vows to spend the rest of your life together.
Coronavirus may not have given us much, but it gave fresh perspective on some key wedding vows: In sickness and in health, till death do us part. Suddenly, weve all been forced to remember that the most important thing we have in this world is our love for each other, and our commitment to care for each other till the end. No pandemic, budget, or changes to plans can take away the most beautiful parts of your wedding day. Wedding vows are the commitment we make to each other. They make us understand what were committing to. Theyre the heart and soul of the wedding.
The Declaration Of Love
Make a simple statement about who s/he is to you. For example:
- Aisha, you are the most amazing woman Ive ever met.
- Matt, you are the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.
- Sam, you are my very best friend.
Say a few things about why s/hes so wonderful. Things like:
- You are kind and caring, and one smile from you brightens my whole day.
- You are dependable, yet full of surprises, and you are beautiful inside and out.
- You make me laugh, you make me think, you make me pancakes, and you make me happy.
Now say you love him/her.
- I am completely and totally in love with you.
- You stole my heart, and I want you to keep it forever.
- I love you so much, and I cant believe how lucky I am to be standing here with you today.
Nice work! On to the next part!
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Wedding Vow Examples To Inspire Your Own
“Gabriel, you came into my life at exactly the right time: When I wasn’t ready, and yet, when I needed your love the most. In the past two years, we’ve experienced great triumphs and literal disasters together. These trials have pushed the boundaries of what we thought we could endure, and in the end, I feel more strongly connected with you in a resolve to get up and try again. I love you dearly for all that you are. I am amazed by your inquisitive mind and tickled by your sense of humor. I may not want to admit it, but I even love your awful puns.
You have stuck by me through the best and worst and loved all that I am. You help me to be the finest version of me that I can.
As your wife, I promise to love you with the same determination and confidence you’ve given me. I vow to support you through more ups and downs. I pledge to commit myself to our family and the good I know will grow from it. I promise this all to you until I am no more.”Marissa
“Marissa, I love you with all my heart. I have been thankful for these past two years that you were not the best driver on that fateful day. Stopping in the middle of a busy 90/04 to see if everyone was okay, there I met the woman who is standing before me today. When we started dating, I gained a family, a woman who loves me, and an adorable whippetboth of whom I adore with all my heart. We have survived trials and tribulations, from Hurricane Irma to differing political views, we have pulled through.
The Best Sample Wedding Vows To Steal
Now that you know how to write your wedding vows, weve rounded up some of our favorite vows from APW couples, along with marriage vows from religions across the world, to get you started. Heres to hoping they inspire you to create meaningful marriage vows for yourselves, and not at 2:00 a.m. Lets look at some of the best real wedding vows weve come across, plus a selection of beautiful traditional vows from world religions.
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Sample Traditional Vow #7
, I take you to be my lawfully wedded . Before these witnesses, I vow to love you and care for you as long as we both shall live. I take you with all of your faults and your strengths as I offer myself to you with all of my faults and strengths. I will help you when you need help, and I will turn to you when I need help. I choose you as the person with whom I will spend my life.
Get Some Ideas Down On Paper
Head somewhere its quiet and you can think. You might find it easier to write your vows in stages so start by making some notes.
Heres a few questions you can think about to get you started and give you ideas on what to say:
- When did you first meet?
- How did you get together?
- When did you realise she/he was the one?
- What little details make you smile when you think of him/her?
- How do you balance each other out? Is he super-organised, whereas youre more of the fly-by-the-seat-of-your-pants type?
- Why are you getting married? What does it mean to you?
- What promises do you want to make for a happy marriage?
Dont worry about constructing perfect sentences or how things sound to start with, just get your ideas down. You may well end up with pages and pages. Great! Once you have plenty of notes, you can choose the bits that really stand out to you, and then start polishing them up. The reason youre writing your own vows is to make them personal, so dont rush deciding what you want to say.
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Where Do You See Yourselves In 10 Years 20 Years And 40 Years
Go beyond, “Happily married in a big house.” What are your long-term hopes dreams and goals? And remember, it could be as simple as enjoying the sunset on a pair of Adirondack chairs, or as big as being there for each other when times get tough.
Wedding vow template: I can’t wait to __________, laughing and __________ as we __________.
Types Of Modern Wedding Vows
Some couples opt to write down their modern wedding vows themselves the marriage vows for her and him, some adapt vows from different sources while some follow written vows that express perfectly what they want to say to each other.
There are many ways you can say your marriage vows, but the most important thing is they are a true expression of your feelings and how you relate to this start of a new and wonderful relationship.
Some of the most beautiful vows are the traditional vows that beautifully express the essence of marriage. The promise to love and cherish in sickness and in health, for better or worse, portrays the couples commitment to making the marriage work.
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Pick Your Favorite Anecdote
Laughter and smiles are key to serve you well throughout your marriage. What better way to begin your new journey than with fun-loving memories of your relationship. So go after laughter with sweet, short anecdotes from your love story to bring your emotions to life. A personal story will give an insight to your guests into your intimate connection with your beloved partner. A destination wedding with humor sounds perfect!