What To Do If Your Wedding Guests Dont Rsvp In Time
Every soon-to-be-married couple has one problem in common: invitees that dont RSVP. For some reason, there are always some potential guests that refuse to respond to their invitation. Its not always clear why, but its important that you find out whether they are or arent coming otherwise, you cant finalise your table plan!
What should you do if your wedding guests dont RSVP in time? Politely remind them to respond, first through email and text, then by calling. If you cant get in touch with them, consider meeting them in person. If they still wont respond whether its because theyre embarrassed, unsure whether they can attend, or simply cant be bothered to then its safe to assume that they arent coming.
This guide will talk you through the proper way to handle guests that refuse to RSVP by the cut-off date. The most important thing is to stay polite and calm and remember to enjoy your big day no matter what happens.
How Long Should You Give Your Wedding Guests to RSVP?
You should give your guests plenty of time to RSVP. This is because some people might need quite a bit of time to work out whether they can attend. They might need to organise their budget , try to book time off work, or arrange childcare. Theyll have to fix all of the above before they can give you their firm yes or no.
How Do You Politely Ask Guests to RSVP?
Send an Email or Text Reminder
Deadline Day Phone Call
Meet in Person
Assume They Arent Coming
What Should You Say To People Who Didn’t Rsvp
Ask them if they received the invitation and how you hope they’re planning on attending but you haven’t heard from them. Most likely, they’ll apologize for their tardiness then quickly give you an answer. If they’re unsure, ask them to call or text you within 24 hours, explaining you have to give the caterer a final number. If they still don’t contact you by the next day, count them out.
How To Politely Remind Guests To Rsvp
Late RSVPs are a part of every wedding. Don’t stress. Instead, follow our guide to kindly reminding your guests to please RSVP for your wedding.
Its no secret that wedding planning involves a long list of to-dos for the couple. It also includes a list of to-dos for guests. Whats one of the most important guest tasks? Remembering to RSVP. If you sent traditional invitations, RSVP cards were likely part of your invitation suite. RSVP cardsand the postmarked envelopes that they come withmake it easy for guests to say yes they can make it or regretfully decline. However, that doesnt mean they wont forget. You need a headcount, though, so heres how to remind your wedding guests to RSVP.
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When Should Wedding Rsvp Be
Assuming you‘ve sent your invitations out in time , then give your guests four or five weeks to RSVP. This is plenty of time for people to figure out if they want/are able to attend your wedding, as well as figure out any necessary travel arrangements.
Similarly, what is the etiquette for RSVP to weddings? Etiquette says that invitations should be sent eight weeks before the wedding. That gives four to five weeks to respond, so you can make your RSVP date three to four weeks before the wedding.
In this manner, should you put an RSVP date on a wedding invitation?
The RSVP date should be at least two weeks before your wedding so you can give your caterer a more accurate head count. Include a pre-addressed envelope that they can use to send back their reply, or direct them specifically to the email, phone number, or URL they should use to RSVP.
How early is too early for wedding invitations?
three to four months
Confirm Rsvp Reply Date
Before you make your wedding RSVP invitations, you need to establish and confirm a reply date.
Guests should reply no less than 2 weeks before the reception. However, RSVP reply dates greatly vary and depend on a few things
You need to confirm the RSVP reply date with your venue coordinators and caterers. They need a final headcount by a certain date so they can plan everything accordingly.
Your florist and cake decorator may also need a final headcount. Florists need an idea of how your floor plan will be set up. Whoever is preparing your desserts needs to make sure there is plenty to go around.
You also want to give yourself enough time with the RSVP reply date. Youll need a headcount if you plan to provide your guests with party favors, for example.
If planning a destination wedding, invitees should get an RSVP card at least 2-3 months in advance.
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What Happens If You Rsvp And Dont Go
Even if you are unable to make it, you should still send the couple a wedding gift. You could also offer to take them out to dinner after the wedding to celebrate the occasion with them. But try not to feel too guilty about it as long as you handle the situation respectfully, the couple should understand.
How Should I Reach Out
How you contact the guests who have yet to RSVP will depend on your relationship to them. For example, for close family relatives and friends whom you see on a regular basis, you might consider simply asking them in person. For distant relatives or friends who you dont speak to on the regular, a phone call, text, or email might yield the best response rate.
Social media is another great tool for reaching out to guests. However, be sure to avoid any group messages or posts that might reach friends or followers who did not get your original invite.
Generally, a phone call or quick email should do it. In the case of any of your parents friends, ask mom or dad to nudge as necessary.
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When To Ask For Rsvps
Short Answer: 1 Month from Wedding Date
Your wedding invitation must include a way for guests to respond. Whether you choose to have guests RSVP online via your wedding website, or you send an RSVP card and pre-addressed envelope as part of your invitation suite, be sure to indicate an RSVP deadline so that guests know when they need to alert you to their decision. The rule of wedding invitation etiquette says that one month before your wedding date is the perfect amount of time: it offers a brief window for guests to receive the invitation and consider their decision, while also providing your wedding vendors enough advance notice to order and prepare supplies. The sooner you’re able to get an accurate guest count, the sooner you’re able to finalize your wedding planning details .
A one-month-prior deadline also adds some timeline padding for those stragglers who wont get their RSVP card in on time…because you know there will be those!
When Should We Send Out Our Wedding Invitations
Traditionally, invitations go out six to eight weeks before the wedding. That gives guests plenty of time to clear their schedules and make travel arrangements if they don’t live in town. If it’s a destination wedding, give guests more time and send them out three months ahead of the wedding. Most couples also send out save-the-date cards so that their guests can hold the day in their calendar before getting into the nitty-gritty details. Save-the-dates typically are sent out six to eight months before the wedding.
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How To Fill Out A Wedding Rsvp Card
A wedding RSVP card will look different for every event, depending on the couples style and the formality of the celebration. However, there are a few things that are pretty standard across all RSVP cards. Heres a breakdown of what you might typically find on a response card:
What Does The M Means On A Wedding Rsvp
On more formal wedding invitations, the name line is often preceded by a capital letter M. What does this mean, and more importantly, what is it for? Its actually pretty simple. The M indicates that guests should fill out the line for their names with their proper title: Mr., Mrs., Ms., Miss.
- For example: M r. Shawn Jay-Z Carter & Mrs. Beyoncé Knowles-Carter
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How Do I Remind My Wedding Guests To Rsvp
So your RSVP deadline has come and gone. Before jumping to panic, remember all the times you let invitations or emails slide without a timely responseit happens. Depending on the size and style of your wedding, the day you absolutely need a final headcount will vary. Ideally, you have responses two months ahead of your day so that you can plan your seating chart and other last-minute treats like wedding favors.
We recommend waiting for one to two weeks after your deadline to start nudging your guests. Then you can take to your guest list and start tracking down those no responses.
How Early Is Too Early For Wedding Invitations
Many brides want to send out their invitations early so that they can confirm their numbers with vendors, but sending wedding invitations too early can be a mistake. Often, guests end up leaving the invitation in a pile of mail and forget to respond, or they cannot commit to a date so far in advance. In other cases, they may RSVP yes and then forget about it because so much time has passed between their RSVP and the actual event.
As we stated above, anywhere from 8 weeks to 16 weeks before the wedding is an acceptable time to send invitations. Sending out invitations earlier may seem like a good idea to get planning done sooner, but ultimately it may make finalizing your guest list numbers more difficult.
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Give Guests Options For Rsvp
Everyone likes options, and realistically, the more ways your guests can say yes or no to the wedding, the better for you, right? While mail-in cards are still the traditional choice, not everyone uses the mail as they once did, points out event planning expert Sandy Hammer, co-founder of AllSeated. List a phone number, email address, or wedding website guests can also RSVP at on your invites to boost your response rate.
“If you do decide to stick strictly to mail-in cards, make them easy to fill out and pre-stamp a self-addressed envelope for each guest,” suggests Hammer.
What To Do If You Cant Attend A Wedding After Rsvping Yes
Life happens, and there will be instances where you are unable to attend a wedding after you have said yes on the RSVP. Whether it be inclement weather, an illness, or an emergency, theres a right and wrong way to inform the couple that you wont be able to make it to the celebration:
- Have a good reason for your cancellation. Only back out if the circumstances are truly serious, such as a severe illness or a family emergency. Time and money have been dedicated to preparing for your presence at the wedding, so dont disregard your commitment lightly.
- Dont bother the couple if its the wedding day. If you need to cancel on the day of the wedding, dont reach out to the couple. Instead, touch base with the planner or the maid of honor or best man to inform them that you are unable to attend. The couple should be focused on getting married and distractions like these will only cause stress.
- Apologize. Even if the situation was outside of your control, its good decorum to apologize to the couple for missing their big day. As mentioned before, lots of planning was done to secure your spotlet them know that you appreciate all their prep work by issuing a sincere apology for your absence.
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When Should We Make The Deadline For Rsvps
Make your RSVP date two to three weeks before your wedding date to allow enough time for you to get a final head count to the caterer and to finalize your seating chart. If some guests still haven’t responded by your deadline, give them a quick call and ask for their RSVPs so you have all their information.
When To Send Wedding Invitations With No Save
If you choose not to send save-the-dates, feel free to send your wedding invitations out a bit earlier than if you had. In the 8 to 16 week range, you may want to lean more towards 16 weeks before the wedding for invitations if you did not send guests a save- the-date. This way, guests have a little more warning and more time to plan.
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Other Tips For Your Wedding Rsvp
Wedding RSVP etiquette is straightforward for the most part.
Interested in additional tips to help you send out stellar RSVP invitations? Here are some more:
- Whoever is planning your seating chart should receive the RSVPs. Whether thats you, your maid of honor, your mom, or your wedding planner. Make sure this address is pre-written on the return envelope.
- If you decide to pre-stamp your RSVP return envelopes, try to use the same stamp as your Save-the-Date. Its a minor detail, but the little things help to jog peoples memories.
- Dont include your wedding registry information on the RSVP. Mention your wedding registry on your bridal shower invitations instead.
- Leave space on the RSVP so people can write you. This allows them to let you know of food allergies or special accommodations. Your friends and family can also write you notes that can help you get excited about your big day!
Simple Sprigs RSVP from Minted
Know the Essential Elements of Wedding RSVP
Disaster can strike at any moment while planning a wedding. But, you can avoid it while coordinating your RSVP list!
Knowing RSVP etiquette can help you create the best RSVP invitations. You can also avoid hassles and problems along the way. Learn more about how to plan your special day and much more!
How Far In Advance Should Bridal Shower Invites Be Sent Out
If many guests will be local, aim to send the invites four to six weeks before the event. A bridal shower involving many out-of-towners, on the other hand, requires more advanced notice. Six or eight weeks should be sufficient time for long-distance guests to make transportation and lodging arrangements.
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